Women were born with the ability to daydream, and those of us who don’t, should. What a cruel world to live in if we could not paint a picture in our minds of things that won’t ever be, but can be envisioned anyway!







I’ll share this with you now: I have a thing for older men. It’s been that way since…well, forever I think. Being submerged in the art that is cinema, I almost always fell into a frantic crush for the ones that most of my friends dismissed.

I remember my first cinema crush was an old Dracula. I think I was eleven, mayhaps twelve?  According to recent critics, he wasn’t even a great Dracula. I’m sure, back then, he was about 40, and the movie was made in the late 70’s…he had longish thick black hair and dark eyes and something about him made me uncomfortable and I liked it. After seeing the movie I fell asleep thinking about him every night for weeks.


Soon after, I became entranced with ” V ” in all its secret green-skinned glory, and I discovered the pre-Freddy Robert Englund.  He was a little younger than my Dracula crush, but nonetheless I was smitten, and I have no idea why. He wasn’t particularly gorgeous…but something about his eyes. There’s always something about eyes that will motivate you to feel, or reel.


It wasn’t long before I was trapped by the voice, the gyrations, and the sneer of David Bowie, in Labyrinth as the delectable Jareth.  Oh, how he made me sweat.  I live inside my own head, and between my ears exists a constant little storyteller, unwinding tales where I am smuggled away into a land where I am helpless to do anything but the bidding of the Goblin Prince.





Jareth gave way to the strong return of Robert Englund when Freddy Krueger slashed his way into my head and heart and gut with no apologies and more than one evil laugh that haunted me night after night.

Heart of Summer

I remember one of my geekier friends gifting me with a copy of a magazine; inside was an 8 page layout of the process in which Freddy Krueger is brought to life via many smaller pieces of fake flesh and Robert Englund slowly disappears into the evil that is burned and horrid.


Yes, to this day I still crush on Robert Englund.  I remember watching one of his movies involving alligators or crocodiles and I HATED HIM and I loved him and anyway…moving along…


Always the older men, you ask? No, not always. Lately I have noticed those talents who are my age, and I shake my head and think, where the hell did you come from? All this talent, embodied into some of the most delicious vessels and the icing on the cake is the brilliant mind bubbling with the unbelievable cutting edge storytelling abilities.


MATT FARNSWORTH.  His eyes will burn holes into your soul. I don’t believe I’ve seen such pools of liquid blue embedded into any other human. Have you? Comfortable in his own skin, whether covered in soft cotton or smeared in gore, he’s one of the few people able to tell a story, tell it well – and make you question his sanity all in one fell swoop.


Likeable? Oh, yes! There are so many stars in the skies of Hollywood — unobtainable, untouchable, the Too-Good’s and the High-and-Mighty’s of the movie industry. And why not? Why would said untouchables want anything to do with us lowly fans? All we did was adore them, and that’s not much…is it..?

This guy, this actor…he writes.  That has, first and foremost, caught my attention. Much respect for the writers of the world. Tell the story because we want to hear it.

He is an actor, a director, a writer, a producer — he edits, creates, and he interacts with his fans.


Yes, it is possible. His interaction whips many of us into a frenzy on a regular basis. 

So…likeable? Absolutely.

Lickable? So I’m hearing on an ever-increasing basis (Oh, ladies, you are so perverted!) and why not just say it outright.  Matt Farnsworth keeps most of his private life just that: private. How refreshing! But, at the same time, he has granted an all-access pass to those who wish to reach out to a star.

He gifts his fans with regular photos. Sometimes, he smiles…and it drives the ladies wild.


I think this attitude toward fans should have been this way in the beginning. But I also think the industry doesn’t like to allow ordinary people access into the hearts of the beloved stars who shine down on us all. I suspect Matt Farnsworth doesn’t give a damn, because he doesn’t mind being accessible, enjoys it, enjoys our reactions to him.


This guy pushes the envelope – his storytelling ability makes me squirm. I see the images flashing before me in particular sequences and automatically my mind wants to shut down. There are those tales no one will tell.  Someone forgot to tell him that.

I want to ask him ten questions, followed by ten more, but I hesitate; after all he is incredibly busy, and my interview is for my own selfish curiosity only. 

I remember a friend returning the copy of TOK she’d borrowed from me, and she said, “I haven’t been that disturbed for a long time.”

I said, “Really..? Did you like it?” She replied with, “That’s some scary shit there. You actually spoke to the guy that wrote it?” to which I answered in the affirmative.  She just shook her head. “That’s one disturbed individual.” 

I pulled up a photo and showed her. I could see the reaction playing across her face. She liked what she saw. Finally she said, “Of course, he’d have to be hot. All the crazy ones are.”


Au contraire, dear friend. He’s not crazy…at least I’m fairly certain he’s not.  He’s just got some kind of insane gift, creating a creature destined to slash through many a heart and mind in the coming months and years. Marcus Miller is not going away anytime soon. I wouldn’t have it any other way.





The statements within this document are mostly opinion, with some facts thrown in, y’know, to keep it interesting.


8 thoughts on “CRUSHES

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